Women’s Perfectionism


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PeWomen’s Perfectionism?

Perfectionism, according to WebMD, is the propensity to demand flawless outcomes, deeds, and behaviors. It explains the need of doing everything flawlessly and on schedule. It is characterized by a strong desire and persistent work to produce amazing outcomes. If such objectives are not achieved, however, it also results in cycles of disappointment. Perfectionism may cause individuals to feel unstable and nervous because they believe they are a failure after making even one mistake.

Women and Perfectionism

Time Magazine claims that women have more difficulties than males do with confidence and self-assurance, which might result in perfectionistic inclinations. Because of the inherent expectation on women to be flawless on their own, many don’t think they have the right to ask for assistance. Young girls and women are under tremendous pressure to be “perfect” in every manner because they are expected to be for generations. They feel pressurized to be the ideal moms, friends, and bodies.

According to Dr. Brene Brown’s study, women suffer with perfectionism in three primary areas:

  • body perception
  • Giving Care
  • Being a mother

Dr. Brown claims that when women are unable to fulfill all of these tasks, they undervalue themselves and sell themselves short. This puts additional strain on women, who often have to balance paid employment with their invisible labor (emotional labor, caring for others, etc.) without realizing how much time, effort, and resources their unpaid labor consumes. Conversely, women who delay taking on caregiving responsibilities are often seen as uncaring, egocentric, and unappreciative, which may result in a negative self-talk loop.

Social media and perfectionism

One skewed perception propagated by social media is that everyone has a perfect, fulfilled existence. But maybe the whole image is hidden from us. We feel inspired to keep working toward the same objective when we witness women with flawless bodies going on trips, succeeding in their occupations, and taking care of others. According to Dr. Jeremy Tyler, this comparison might cause feelings of inferiority and dread of losing out. Psychology Today claims that women compare themselves to the women they see on screens based only on beauty, which makes them feel unworthy. Social media is a hotbed of body shaming, which stigmatizes women for having lower self-esteem.

Perfectionism and Mental Well-Being

Although it may seem like a unique problem, perfectionism affects a lot of individuals, particularly women. By setting unrealistic expectations for us, it has an adverse effect on our mental health by creating a vicious cycle of disappointment, failure, and hopelessness. Psychology Today reports that there is a correlation between increased incidence of sadness in young females and this kind of self-critical perfectionism. Higher rates of anxiety and health issues including body pains, migraines, and sleeplessness are also associated with perfectionism. Mental diseases such as eating disorders, anxiety, and depression may all be traced back to perfectionism.

How to Stop Trying to Be Perfect

The methods listed below may help you let go of perfectionism:

  • Acknowledge our shame triggers, engage in critical awareness, and establish reasonable objectives for oneself.
  • To modify the story, regain confidence, and feel better about ourselves, we must adjust our own expectations of ourselves.
  • Request assistance. It might be hard to accept that we will never be flawless.
  • By coming to terms with the fact that we will disappoint others and that’s acceptable, we may become more resilient in the face of the relentlessly negative narrative.
  • Recognize our advantages and how we may collaborate with others to achieve our shared objectives.

Being more self-compassionate allows us to carry out our many responsibilities and make positive changes in society.


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